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User blog:Adriano Tomás Portugal/Dr. Samara Yasmin’s Patient
Ok then iff every one is making a Fan story of Dead space so wy can´t I? This is the first session of Dr.Samara whit crazy isaac. enjoy!!! Chapter 1: The Crazy Guy Dr.Samara: Hello issac my name is Samara Yasmin and i am here to talk about you Isaac: ... Dr.Samara: well what happened in the ishimura? Isaac: Stuff... Dr.Samara: What kind of "stuff"? Isaac: Play the game and find out!!! Dr.Samara: What are you talking about? Isaac: You know! There is a game Called Dead Space where you play has me! Dr.Samara: of course there is, what is the game about? Isaac: You Know, Killing Necromorphs by Cutting their limbs whit a brood cutter, Being Kendra's Bit***, Solve not so complex Puzzles, and its scary has hell!!! Dr.Samara: Right...Are you a drug addict? Isaac: YES...(Fuc*) I mean NO!!! Dr.Samara: Ok...(writing in her little paper) changing the subject. What about Nicole, is She here? Isaac: Oh yes she is just looking at you fixedly whit her red glowing eyes...I think she likes you. Dr.Samara: Of curse she is...(thinking: "wy the hell did i whanted to work whit this crazy people")...What do you two usually talk about? Isaac: I didn't Talk about eny thing, because until now i was mute. But She allways says "make us hole again", "you can´t run for ever" and sh*** like that. Dr.Samara: Wy where you mute? Isaac: I don´t know, probably EA Games didn't convinced eny one to be my voice actor. Dr.Samara: ... Isaac: I am now going to tray to kill you wille i say unitology sh*** "like they need our bodys" or "you Can't stop it". Dr.Samara: WHAT?! Narrator: Hello i am the Narrator, i am now going to narrate what isaac is going to do whit Dr.Samara. and yes this Text Sucks. Issac jumps from is shiny and futuristic chair and grabs Samara's neck wille he sais unitolgy manbo jambo, Then the guards start to punch isaac to stop him of killing the poor Dr, Dr Samara: OMG you ARE CRAZY!!! Isaac: WHY THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM IN A MADHOUSE IDIOT?! Narrator: And Then the guards take him to his cell While he talks about killing him self and how much he loves cake and stuff...THE END...of part one. Unknown guy 1: WHAT?! There is more comming?! Narrator: Well yes thats why(i apparently have written wy instead of why silly me =)) its Chapter 1... Unknown guy 2: This is the worst Dead Space fan text Ever and you whant to make more?! are you Crazy?! Narrator: No i am not crazy!!!....but isaac is. Unknown guy 1: Fu** this Sh*** i am not going to read eny more of this crap!!! Unknown guy 2: yes you are right Unknown guy 1 lets go!!! Unknown guy 1: yest lets go and eat some ice cream Unknown guy 2: NO i whant i hot dog! Unknown guy 1: No Ice cream!! Unknown guy 2: Hot dog!! Unknown guy 1:ice cream!! Unknown guy 2:Hot dog!!! Narrator: meanwhile... Unknown guy 1/2: SHUT THE FU*** UP Narrator!!! This fan text is OVER!!!! THE END...................? Chapter 2: Orion is an idiot name Narrator:Hello pathetic lovers of violence and intestines of this... Unknown guy 1: WTF?! i don´t belive it this guy actualy made a Chapter 2!!! Unknown guy 2:What?! he did? WTF is wrong whit you? are you crazy? how many times do we have to tell you that your pathetic textes suck? you have told that yourself (chapter 1: narrator first line:"... and yes this Text Sucks") WTF man!!! Narrator: I only sai that to make people laugh!!! Unknown guy 1: Well...we didn't laugh. Narrator: Well thats your problem you fu*** namless emos!!! Unknown guy 2: Well now you are insulting us?...No wait you even insulted the God Damn reader!!! WTF is this sh.. Narrator: IFF YOU DON'T SHUT YOUR FUC*** FACE, I WILL KILL YOUR MOTHERS WHIT A RABIES SQUIRREL!!!! Unknown guy 1/2:....ok fine by me... Narrator: Fine then, and now something you realy enjoy. 1 day after 1st Chapter... Narrator: Isaac finaly exits hes punishment: the cryogenic sleep!!! wich isn't realy a punishment because you don´t realy fill nothing you just sleep...wierd huh? Unknown guy 1: no comment Narrator:(thats more like it!) in the madhouse's(i still hate google translator)Luch-brake isaac goes to the canteen and takes a banana... Unknown guy 1: A Banana? why... Narrator: SHUT IT (weird squirrel sounds (NOT) far away) Unknown guy 1:O.....O...k..kk Narrator: continuing. Isaac takes the banana and sits down in the canteen. Orion: YOU KILLED MY SISTER!!!(oh bay the way he is a big fat WHITE dude because has you know Hammond was the last black dude in the dead space universe) Isaac: What? No!!! Orion:My siter was USG Ishiputa, were you in the Ishiputa(Fear my Portuguese swear-word!!!) Isaac: I think you mean Ishimura... Orion: Sorry i was eating a banana. Unknown guy 2: what is your affection whit bananas? (squirrel sounds)...ok ok ok i shut up Orion:So were you in the Ishimura? Isaac: yes i was. Orion SO YOU KILLED HER!!! Isaac: No i didn't killed eny on...Human in the Ishimura!!! how was she like? Orion: she was a nurse, she usualy wears a bloody nurse clothing, she laughs has an crazy evil (B)witch and she likes to cut Almost dead guys. Isaac: huh...I am almost sure that she killed herself... Orion: What!!! how!!! isaac: whit a big knife... Orion: OMG....yoh MAMA!!! Mama: What is it you notre dame's hunchback!!! Orion: Sindy killed herself!!! Mama: I didn't liked her...She was too much like her father...Mr.hyena... Orion: What ever Mama, I love you. Mama:Well i don't love you failed abortion!!! Orion: so Isaac right, why are you here? Isaac: I don´t know...probably the Markers effects have changed my mind some how. Orion: well you are more koo koo than i. Isaac: well why are you here? Orion: I have raped a horse... Isaac: ._. Orion: Well don´t worry ill only rape the new guy two times a week, and when i get out of here ill do the horse again!!! Narrator: one Second later... Isaac: TAKE ME OUT OF HERE!!!!!!!! The end Unknown guy 1: shi**est fan text ever!!!(evil squirrel sounds)...OMG MOTHER!!!! Category:Blog posts